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There is a list of things I can control now. There is also a list of things that I can’t control now. The latter is a huge challenge. It drives me up the wall. I find myself clenching my teeth, scrunching my eyebrows, and saying out loud. “It’s just not fair.”
As for the things I can control now? The list seems to be growing daily and lately, I see it as an awakening of things I took for granted before all of this. Right before my eyes, I am stopping. Admiring. Absorbing. It is fuelling my soul and giving me purpose. As a result of these new feelings, my thoughts are almost unrecognizable. Perhaps it’s the people I am hanging around with that are teaching me a whole new perspective on how to take care of myself.
Here is the kicker. Things I can control now VS things I can’t control. Where do you think I should place my energy? Duh. I know I don’t have to spell it out for you. Everyone knows that answer, but come on. It’s. Just. So. Damn. Hard.
It’s easy and I have to admit reassuring and a little bit fun to have a good ‘ol fashioned pity party. It feels great to let ‘er rip and complain to your friends what you are missing. What you can no longer do and what you wish you can just do for just one night. For just one hour. I miss those things too.
I know you are probably expecting me to encourage you to brush off those feelings of loss and just get up, go for a run and move on.
Nope.
It’s totally OK to drown your sorrows in what you can’t have. Even before this pandemic, people were always looking over at their neighbours lawn, thinking that it was totally greener then theirs. It’s human nature. We can’t help it. So say it. Yell about it. Cry about it. Get it out of your system.
I’ve said it before and I will say it again, grab your most trusted friend and take turns sharing your feelings. Get it all out. Even if it has to be done virtually.
You can also…
I don’t know about you, but I’ve been having these wild and crazy dreams. I’ve been calling them “COVID Dreams.” I am keeping a journal by my bed to write them all down as soon as I wake up. Then I share these dreams with my friends and we have a good time trying to figure out what they mean. It’s a whole new level of diving deeper into our subconscious! I dare you to try it.
Aside from your dreams, you should keep track of your feelings in general in this journal. The ups, downs, and everything in between. This pandemic is history and you want to remember all of the blood sweat and tears from it. Trust me, your grandchildren will thank you for these stories. Even the one where you tried to make that chocolate chip banana bread and failed. But tried again.
I know that when all of this is over, I will look back on this and appreciate what I went through and how I got through it all. You will too!
You know this was coming. After the pity party, the journal writing, the screaming and yelling, along with all of that colourful language in between, it’s time to get up. And move on.
The act of getting up from the dark place that you have been in may be painful. Like a bandage being ripped off of your leg. To make this process easier, the act of physically moving your body will help.
You will be surprised by what your body will hold on to when it’s angry. Can you feel the stiffness in your joints? Once you get moving, the outcomes will be more than you expected. Start slow. Move carefully and pretty soon, all will open up.
And your grass will look and feel the greenest it’s ever been.
I’m so grateful to be able to have the opportunity to write what I’m passionate about and what I think will serve others. If you would like me to write about you and or for your own company, please be in touch.